[Other people might've, sure. Other people also hadn't seen that glimmer of hope in him, Bonnie thinks as she folds her arms and turns to look at him.]
You also left that same army. [Whole reason Katherine was able to sink her nails (and teeth) into Damon and Stefan at the same time. Bonnie's shrug is smaller than usual, and she's tempted to pull her gaze back towards that (slowly growing) fire.] Damon, if you really believed in slavery... or anything the Confederacy believed in, really... you wouldn't have given Emily the time of day.
But she trusted you enough to protect my family, and that means something.
[No use dwelling on the past, she thinks, because it's clearly bringing him nothing but grief. If he did value those ideals, or what his father thought of him, then he wouldn't have tried to burn them. Right?]
Don't be naive. I used Emily to get what I wanted. The fact that she trusted me is a statement about her character, not mine.
I wasn't an abolitionist. I left the Confederate army because I didn't feel like dying so my dad and his friends could keep their slaves. And then I came home, and I was waited on hand and foot by my father's slaves. I went out to see friends, and our dinners were served by their slaves.
And I. Didn't. Care.
[It's a lie. Slavery made him vaguely uncomfortable, but not enough to do anything. Intellectually, he disagreed with it ... But it was easier to shrug and go "the world sucks" and preoccupy himself with his pleasures.]
You know, I've always wondered why my father hated vampires so much when really, what could be more Confederate than a vampire? Old as dirt, obsessed with manners, viewing people as things to use as you please ... He would've fit in perfectly.
Maybe I wasn't such a shitty Confederate after all.
[If that little speech doesn't send her running, then there is no hope for her.]
[Except she stands there, rather than packing her things and getting out of Dodge. He wouldn't bluster about how much he didn't care if it wasn't bothering him, and some small part of her knows that. She waits until the very end to say something, but there's something about the thought of a shitty Confederate that amuses her. Bonnie ducks her head, trying to hide that expression far far away from him.
Because yeah, she should be upset. She knows racism better than anyone in this town. Junior cotillion mysteriously lost her invitation, and so did Miss Mystic Falls. She's only a member of a Founding Family when it suits the town's need for diversity. Hell, she wasn't even part of Founders' Day beyond photographing the whole hideous charade. Town hasn't changed much in 150 years.]
Maybe, or maybe you're just like the rest of this town, dealing with a status quo because it was easier than not dealing. [see: Elena, Jeremy, Matt, even Tyler and Caroline. Which is really, when it all boils down to it, why she can't fully be mad at him for being a product of his time (or so he claims). Her own friends can't even notice casual racism when it's staring them in the face.]
You fought for the Confederates then. What're you fighting for now?
Right now I'm fighting to make you see reason. Christ, I thought Elena had compassion problems, but she's got nothing on you.
[He uses his vampire speed and strength to abruptly pin her against the wall.]
I'm a bad guy, Bonnie. You need to remember that.
[He knows he's already undercut his own case by grabbing her shoulders instead of her throat. Anyone else, he would have done that, no question — even Elena. But it's stupidly hard to bring himself to threaten Bonnie Bennet, even when it's for her own damn good.]
[She huffs at him, narrowing her eyes and taking in short, shallow breaths like she's trying to hold in something (tears? frustration beyond words? both??) - and she can't. She's on the verge of breaking down, but it's not because of his compliance with a racist world. It's how often he insists he's this big bad creature that goes bump in the night, without once stopping to consider that maybe he has a choice in the matter.]
You have a choice, and at this point, I don't care what you do with it. [Lies. Huge, blatant lies betrayed only by the tears wallowing in her eyes.] I just don't think you should be punishing yourself for something that happened over a century ago.
[She blinks back surprise. Bonnie had fully expected some kind of backlash, or yelling, or - or anything that wasn't him walking away.]
I'm trying to. [Because that list of people who matter? Who she'd die for? It includes him now. He's doing a dumb thing again, trying to chase her off - but she did drive all the way here.
So she takes a deep breath and does the one thing she wouldn't do under normal circumstances: she levitates the letters she hadn't burned, returning them to their place on the desk - along with a box of matches she'd brought with her. (Hey, sometimes her magic fails her.)]
So here. You can burn them and forget... or keep them as a reminder of what happened. It's all on you.
[He doesn't understand her. He really doesn't. How can she still be so invested in helping him after everything he's told her today — hell, after everything he's done to her?]
Go home, Bonnie.
[He needs some time and space to process all this. But he's actually going to process it now, without liquor.]
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no subject
Date: 2016-03-31 03:50 am (UTC)You also left that same army. [Whole reason Katherine was able to sink her nails (and teeth) into Damon and Stefan at the same time. Bonnie's shrug is smaller than usual, and she's tempted to pull her gaze back towards that (slowly growing) fire.] Damon, if you really believed in slavery... or anything the Confederacy believed in, really... you wouldn't have given Emily the time of day.
But she trusted you enough to protect my family, and that means something.
[No use dwelling on the past, she thinks, because it's clearly bringing him nothing but grief. If he did value those ideals, or what his father thought of him, then he wouldn't have tried to burn them. Right?]
no subject
Date: 2016-03-31 04:14 am (UTC)I wasn't an abolitionist. I left the Confederate army because I didn't feel like dying so my dad and his friends could keep their slaves. And then I came home, and I was waited on hand and foot by my father's slaves. I went out to see friends, and our dinners were served by their slaves.
And I. Didn't. Care.
[It's a lie. Slavery made him vaguely uncomfortable, but not enough to do anything. Intellectually, he disagreed with it ... But it was easier to shrug and go "the world sucks" and preoccupy himself with his pleasures.]
You know, I've always wondered why my father hated vampires so much when really, what could be more Confederate than a vampire? Old as dirt, obsessed with manners, viewing people as things to use as you please ... He would've fit in perfectly.
Maybe I wasn't such a shitty Confederate after all.
[If that little speech doesn't send her running, then there is no hope for her.]
no subject
Date: 2016-03-31 06:16 am (UTC)Because yeah, she should be upset. She knows racism better than anyone in this town. Junior cotillion mysteriously lost her invitation, and so did Miss Mystic Falls. She's only a member of a Founding Family when it suits the town's need for diversity. Hell, she wasn't even part of Founders' Day beyond photographing the whole hideous charade. Town hasn't changed much in 150 years.]
Maybe, or maybe you're just like the rest of this town, dealing with a status quo because it was easier than not dealing. [see: Elena, Jeremy, Matt, even Tyler and Caroline. Which is really, when it all boils down to it, why she can't fully be mad at him for being a product of his time (or so he claims). Her own friends can't even notice casual racism when it's staring them in the face.]
You fought for the Confederates then. What're you fighting for now?
no subject
Date: 2016-03-31 07:54 pm (UTC)Right now I'm fighting to make you see reason. Christ, I thought Elena had compassion problems, but she's got nothing on you.
[He uses his vampire speed and strength to abruptly pin her against the wall.]
I'm a bad guy, Bonnie. You need to remember that.
[He knows he's already undercut his own case by grabbing her shoulders instead of her throat. Anyone else, he would have done that, no question — even Elena. But it's stupidly hard to bring himself to threaten Bonnie Bennet, even when it's for her own damn good.]
no subject
Date: 2016-03-31 10:27 pm (UTC)[She huffs at him, narrowing her eyes and taking in short, shallow breaths like she's trying to hold in something (tears? frustration beyond words? both??) - and she can't. She's on the verge of breaking down, but it's not because of his compliance with a racist world. It's how often he insists he's this big bad creature that goes bump in the night, without once stopping to consider that maybe he has a choice in the matter.]
You have a choice, and at this point, I don't care what you do with it. [Lies. Huge, blatant lies betrayed only by the tears wallowing in her eyes.] I just don't think you should be punishing yourself for something that happened over a century ago.
no subject
Date: 2016-03-31 11:47 pm (UTC)Yes. I choose to be the bad guy. So save your compassion for someone else.
[With that, he lets go of her and steps back.]
Take care of the people who matter.
no subject
Date: 2016-04-01 07:51 am (UTC)I'm trying to. [Because that list of people who matter? Who she'd die for? It includes him now. He's doing a dumb thing again, trying to chase her off - but she did drive all the way here.
So she takes a deep breath and does the one thing she wouldn't do under normal circumstances: she levitates the letters she hadn't burned, returning them to their place on the desk - along with a box of matches she'd brought with her. (Hey, sometimes her magic fails her.)]
So here. You can burn them and forget... or keep them as a reminder of what happened. It's all on you.
time for a new thread, i think
Date: 2016-04-01 11:48 pm (UTC)Go home, Bonnie.
[He needs some time and space to process all this. But he's actually going to process it now, without liquor.]
sounds good!
Date: 2016-04-02 05:36 am (UTC)God, she messed that one up big time. Worst part was, she was actually trying.]